Short Story Competition: School Years 8 to 10 winner ‘Natures Mess’
By Leah Hobbs
The entirety of the dense, overcrowded forest of deteriorating trees seemed to be still – frozen in time as if some inhumane, ethereal force had somehow stopped all movement in the once buzzing undergrowth. Darkness settled like a phantom enchantment, casting its foul spell every possible direction – it hovered above each squelching, rotting leaf, possessing the trembling trees that loomed overhead so that the decaying branches protruding out looked like menacing talons ready to snatch up any innocent soul who dared to enter that godforsaken territory of decomposing shrubbery and isolation. It was a veil, a cloak, which smothered every aspect or the woods, so that all that was seen ahead was the jagged naked claws or the condescending trees only lit up by the faintest moonlight.
The army or once lush, vibrant trees that were full of life and hope had been possessed by a filthy, ever-growing parasite. A toxic green mush coated every rock, every twig, every possible surface with its thick grimy poison; it tainted everything, eroding life as we call it, eating away at it like a putrid acid with an evil mind of its own, bulging and bubbling with a thirst for domination. It was almost alien- the oozing and squelching of the sickly moss breathing slowly as it consumed every aspect or everything. Though the entire place reeked of death, the rancid moss was breathing, swelling in and out, making disgusting gurgling noises each time it rose.
As for the trees- they were even more terrifying than the rot that covered them from top to bottom. Giant Strangling Figs: the terror they inflicted as they loomed in the dusk was
profound. Huge roots protruded out of each tree; tangled and mangled and intertwined with one another in a massive knot of horror, resembling a pit of bloodthirsty, venomous vipers trying to prey on whoever was unfortunate enough to be there. Each root reached out further than the next, ready to snatch you up with its wooden claws and trap you forever.
Some of the evil moss had decayed even more, exposing the bare bark of the petrifying trees. The tree's bark was an enigmatic cloak, tightly wrapped and winding around the truck: concealing its depraved secrets that were hidden so well by the mangled mess of roots and shoots. The bark was so clamp as if it had been drowned by an eternal rain, (and so was everything else), so another soggy specimen seemed to be clinging onto it- this is time the parasite was a deep brown colour, matching the hue of the wet floor.
Every bit of solid ground had turned into a sodden marchland; the only thing that
seemed to grow were the godforsaken trees, the godforsaken moss and ... Berries? They eyed Mia up and down, sending her into a trace, hypnotising her. Starvation hit. Just one would be fine, right? Their siren song called her, luring her in and tempting her to take one bright red, juicy berry. No! Suddenly her gut took charge, and she ran full force away from those evil spirits with her eyes drawn forward. She ran for what seemed like forever until she stumbled: finally, her eyes focused and she realised she'd found the sacred path she'd been looking for. Still, this would only be the start.
Judge’s Comments:
This writer is a master of atmospheric writing. The reader is immediately transported to a forest where everything seems to be veiled in a layer of mystery and foreboding. The story is tense, and keeps the reader guessing until the very end. In this story nature is transformed into a menacing character. The sense of danger is undeniable, from the descriptive depiction of the trees with ‘decaying branches’ and the ‘rancid moss’ covering everything, you can’t help but feel the fear flying off the page.
